Years and years and years ago, I wrote in this column the things that I had learned in life. I read the column the other day and thought I should update what I have learned. After all, I have aged some, and what I have learned has gotten quirkier.
Ah, Life…what we can learn after we’ve been around for awhile.
These are a few truths I’ve learned over the years:
- Whatever you really love eating messes with your blood pressure.
- If you get complimented on an outfit, don’t tell anyone you’ve had it since 1981.
- If you have trouble with your computer, printer, cell phone, call your grandchild.
- Going out to eat keeps the kitchen clean.
- Having a cleaning person is a necessity, no matter what the cost.
- Never refuse anything sweet, especially dark chocolate. It’s good for you.
- Senior Day at the restaurant should be starred on the calendar.
- Don’t dye your hair a weird color.
- Don’t answer the phone with an out-of-state number. They’re trying to sell you insurance.
- Don’t drink a lot of water before you go to bed.
- When you’re parking, make sure you’re within the lines.
- Water your outdoor potted plants. The weatherman isn’t always right.
- Nothing known to women cures wrinkles.
- Never sit in a soft, soft chair.